I’m Drowning In My Tears

I’m Drowning In My Tears: Poem by Bonnie Gail Carter. Click on https://youtu.be//UTzTXU8Efpg/  As you can tell by the Title of My Poem it’s sad but true. I’m going through the grieving process from the loss of My Companion and best friend last June 2015. Donnie Townsend was a musician, therefor I created the Channel for his music. Donnie is still the Love of My Life.18309919259_86728e2b2e_c


This Woman Is Evil:Check Out The Photo

This is a picture of Donnie Townsend’s Sister, Susie Stewart from Oakdale Indiana and his cousin. Susie is as wicked as she looks in this picture. She is the outcast of the family. At first I liked her but she was being mean to her deaf-mute sister, Barbara. Later she told me she was taking all of the food Barbara liked to eat in her bedroom behind a locked door at night. She would leave her outside on very hot summer days and lock her out of the house and take off in her mini-van. Luckily her sisters Ruth and Judy lived nearby. Susie would go down allies before the garbage man and grab up old and dirty rugs. She would make Barbara scrub them with a scrub brush outside in the heat. Barb was 76 years old. Barb washed all of the dishes and kept the house clean. Susie stole her Social Security check and would buy the expensive scratch off tickets all over Peru, Indiana and pay 65 dollars for her and her useless son to play bingo. Susie is also a gambling addict at the Casino in Anderson. She never had money for food because she was a heavy gambler. She spent the grocery money on gambling and would come to us to get something to eat all of the time. Her husband makes enough money that they should be rich and out of debt of any kind. They pretend to be separated. He lives in a trailer in Rochester and she lives at the house her parents gave to her for taking care of Barbara. She didn’t take care of Barbara: she stole her disability income and didn’t even feed her right. They pretend to be separated because Susie likes to take advantage of government services for the poor. Twice a year she deliberately doesn’t pay her utility bills and goes to the Township Trustee with shut off notices to get them paid. Then she goes crying to the courthouse lady about how she doesn’t have the money to pay on the back taxes on the house. She’s so deceitful she has the woman there crying with her. Everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. She tells so many lies she can’t remember them all. She trips up and gets caught in lies. The night her brother Donnie died I called her at 5 am because I was up all night before I found out about it. Fifteen minutes after I told her he died she was at his house trying to find the right key to the padlock to the chain on the lawn mower on the front porch. I was in a total state of shock. Susie and her grandson came over every day after Donnie’s death to steal from me. I only told her they could have some of his clothes and some VCR tapes. I had quit eating and didn’t eat any food for six weeks and they stole a van load of things from the house every day. She had the nerve to tell people she was feeding me. She’s such a liar. I was dying and they stole oriental rugs, tools, saws, toolboxes, comforters, curtains, my jewelry, pevey speakers, a mixer board, and four amps, the microphones, telephones. I mean they stole everything and I was to sick to stop it. I couldn’t even walk because I was having real bad dizzy spells from not eating. I had leather furniture and a queen size bed and two recliners in the bedroom. When I left there to go to the airport the furniture was still there but I found out it was stolen too. They even stole the carry on bag I had on the bed to take to the airport with me. Her grandson said he would feed my cat Purina, real chicken with hairball control because that is the only thing she would eat and I mean only thing. They aren’t feeding it to her because I found out she’s going for two days without eating at a time. I’ve cried many tears over the loss of my Cali Girl and Donnie. Susie keeps lying to me and saying she’s going to send me my family pictures from my whole life but she never asks for my address. It’s been eight months and she hasn’t sent me anything that belongs to me. I want all of you to call her and ask her when she’s going to send me my belongings. Her husband makes over 2,000,00 a week so there’s no excuse for it. I want my family photos, my vase my mom made for me and a purple vase with butterflies on it, my clothes, my jewelry and money to buy new furniture with since she kept all of my expensive furniture I can’t replace on disability income. Don’t let her fool you. She’s real good at lying and being deceitful. She’ll probably say something about how bad off she is in pain because she broke her hip or something. Well let me tell you about her morphine pump inside her body. That’s not enough she still wants more drugs. Donnie and I saw her with a known drug dealer several times. Don’t believe a word that comes out of her mouth. She’ll be sugar and spice to your face and laugh at you after she convinces you she is bad off in pain and doesn’t have any money to even buy food. She can turn the tears on too. This picture of her is appropriate because it shows how ugly she really is inside and out. Yea, I’m upset about it. Donnie didn’t even own a bed when I met him. Everything belonged to me. Give the evil witch a call and tell her to get money from her husband to replace the things she stole from me. Tell her to send me my mother’s vase and the purple vase with butterflies on it. Tell her to send me my family photos too. I hope some of you call her because the police say I would have to be there to take her to court and small claims court wouldn’t pay for all that she stole. It would cost me 800.00 for a two way plane ticket and I’m lucky to have two dollars on me. Call her cell phone at 765-244-8270.

I can’t get the police to do anything but maybe you can get her husband to pay me for all that she stole from me. This is America not a country at war where you can steal and plunder whatever you want for yourself. I just don’t have the money to take them to court.

Bonnie Gail Carter




Why Do I Have To Say Goodbye?

18309919259_86728e2b2e_cWhy Do I Have To Say Goodbye? A Poem by Bonnie Gail Carter written to Donnie Townsend at https://youtu.be/CquYQXADnqs/

You’ll have to turn the volume up because I don’t have speakers or a mic. I simply don’t have the money to get them. I hope you like my poems.




I never thought this day would come without you my Love. It came so suddenly and so soon. I’m sending you butterfly kisses and wishes to fly to the moon. Meet me there at midnight so I can hug you so tight and wish upon the stars in the moon light. I want to gaze upon your face and sail on the lake of tears that have flowed in the moons beautiful glow. I want to put my hands on your face and to say those three lovely words we both long to hear after being separated for almost a year. Sail me to the moon so I can be closer to you. The angel dust will stick to me like glue so when I awake I’ll know it all was true. I can see your kiss upon my lips because they sparkle like glitter. I’ve never been a quitter except when it comes to the heartache I feel for you. It’s real cold outside here in the winter. The white snow reminds me of your beautiful hair. Life has never been fair. The wind will pick me up and knock me down out there. So far I’ve gotten back up and keep on trying. What I really want to do is be able to see you by flying through the purple haze and the purple rain to see you again. Being here without you I step in puddles created by tears I’ve shed. I should thank God I’m alive instead but I feel like my heart stopped beating the moment you died. I’m just taking up space in an empty place. I’m all alone in a place I call home but without you all I have is a phone. The world is talking about drones. I’m afraid there’s going to be war here on our soil. Whisper in God’s ear to teach leaders to make peace. I want the killing to stop. If only they knew the kind of love we had that grew. You’re going to be my true Love that so few truly find, My Valentine.


An Original Poem by Bonnie Gail Carter. Copyright.






The color purple makes me smile.

I’d walk an extra mile just to see you for a while.

Does Heaven have a phone number I can dial?

Half of my heart is with you 

and the other half is broken in two.

I want to tell you to come and get me now.

It doesn’t matter how.

I have to die somehow.

The pain is deep down in my soul.

I need you to feel whole.

This world is so cold.

The end times will unfold.

It’s happening now, I’ve been told.

I know the streets are made of gold.

It’s really something to behold.

I’ve seen it in my dreams.

You’ve been gone for a century, it seems.

I watch the birds fly.

I wonder if that’s how your soul feels after you die.

Every night I pick out the brightest star.

It makes me think that’s where you are.

Perhaps the twinkle is you winking from afar.

I ask God to please take me where you are.

I might have to wait for a while but when I see you I’ll

have the biggest smile.



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My Happily Ever After


I’ll Never Say Goodbye


I lived to Love you

so now that you’re gone

what do I do?

I listen to love songs wishing you was here.

My emotions are so real.

Why can’t I touch you

when I feel like you are here.

I still love you so much and I long for your touch.

I can feel you put your arm around me.

You give me a gentle hug

just to tell me I’m still your Love.

Time has separated us for now.

Each day that goes by I feel closer to you somehow.

No, I’ll never say goodbye

because my love for you is so high.

All I do is cry and and ask God why.

Why am I still in this world

knowing you are still beside me.

I know you’re here and that’s what makes it so hard, Dear.

My hand can’t feel you holding it,

My lips can’t feel your gentle kiss and

at bedtime there is no more Goodnight Sweetheart.

I loved you the most because of your gentle tenderness.

You had the biggest heart of anyone I’ve ever known.

That’s why my love for everyone has grown.

You gave me something I’d never known.

You gave me True Love and for that I thank God above.

I sure do miss the sound of Turtle Doves.


An Original Bonnie Gail Carter Poem. Copyright.